Brokenness

My friend used to say to tell me all the time that "hurt people hurt people."

Rationally, I know that Christians are just as, if not more, messed up, broken, and hurt than non-Christians.  On top of that, I know that I am not without my own sins, brokenness, and (glaring) flaws.  I guess that's why God calls us to be perfect, as He is perfect - so that we can be the model people that other, non-believers, would want to be like.  So that we can break the cycle of "hurt people hurt people."

But perfection doesn't come from effort - it never could.  If it could, God Himself would not have had to die on a cross.  In this season of my life, I feel like God is asking me to be (even more) less judgmental.  I feel like He is leading me to have eyes of faith to see others as He sees them.  To lead me to see others as He sees me. 

There is so much wrong in this world, but thankfully we are not without hope.  He is here with me/us.  And He wants me/you to partner with Him to change the world for His Kingdom. 

I pray that God will give me/us enough faith to do that which we cannot, but He can, do.

Knowing vs. Not Knowing

Here's how much I don't know - I don't even know what I don't know.

But there is one thing I do know - I know that God is good. 

In my darkest moments, it's always God who finds me at the end of my rope.

A Little Girl

A little girl went home to be with God yesterday.

The world is a dimmer place without her.  Please pray.

but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” - Matthew 19:14 (ESV)

Prayer

Prayer is indeed the greatest weapon we have in any struggle. 

Being in a conversation with the Almighty is never a waste of time.

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.

The end of summer

I walked out of the office at my usual time last night and for the first time this summer, the sky was dark.  The days are getting shorter!  Winter is coming!

It's been a very eventful couple of months.  I am now a homeowner, in a committed relationship, and officially a mid-level associate.

From glory to glory, with my savior leading the way.

US Consulate in Shanghai

I went to the US consulate in Shanghai for the second time in my life.  The first time was to add some visa pages in my passport, and today was to obtain some notary services for some documents I am signing. 

While I waited for the notary today, my mind wondered back to the first time I was at the US consulate.  My mind may have been playing tricks on me, but I believe that that was the first time I met Janie Gong - I think Alan and Janie were there at the US consulate to get Janie's US passport.  As I reminisced, the memories of the past washed over me and I felt an immense sense of nostalgia - nostalgia for simpler, happier times. 

I pray that I'll see Alan and Janie again soon - to see them both in good health and spirits, resting in the provision and blessing of God.  Longing for the past is not very productive, but I think hoping in God for a better future is a worthwhile pursuit.

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." - Hebrews 11:1

Responsibility

I watched Roman Holiday last night - the classic Audrey Hepburn/Gregor Peck film.   

In the film, Anna, the princess, feels trapped by the sense of duty she owes to her country, her family, her people, etc... so she decides to run away from her country's embassy in Rome... only to return to her out of the same sense of duty. 

The whole film got me thinking about duty and responsibility - particularly on whether or not a person must fulfill their duties or whether a person can reject them.  And I don't know... I know I would never want to reject certain duties placed on me, but when it comes to others, I'm not so sure.  And sometimes different duties actually conflict! 

I know I owe my allegiance to the Highest King (LoTR reference!), so my life should only be committed to that one duty and responsibility.  Maybe God is teaching me what it means to be a slave to righteousness.  And maybe that's not such a bad thing.

But man, if I am to be honest, I feel like I really do want to rebel... to rebel only for rebellion's sake.  I need grace to obey.  More grace.

Grace Abudant.

Your Grace is Enough - Cover by Jenn Johnson of Bethel Church

Your grace is enough, more than I need,
at Your word, I will believe.
I wait for You, draw near again.
Let Your spirit make me new.

And I will fall at Your feet,
I will fall at Your feet.
And I will worship You here.

Your presence in me, Jesus light the way,
by the power of Your word.
I am restored, I am redeemed,
by Your spirit I am free.

And I will fall at Your feet,
I will fall at Your feet.
And I will worship You here.

Freely You gave it all for us
Surrendered Your life upon that cross
Great is Your love, poured out for all,
this is our God.

Lifted on high from death to life,
forever our God is glorified.
Servant and King, rescued the world,
this is our God.
--

In times when I feel uncertainty, doubt, confusion, fear, or anger, God reminds me that He is never cowed or overwhelmed by the circumstances.  He is always in control.

So I worship.  Because there is nothing more important than loving Him.

Keys

I am forever misplacing things.  I think I lost my house keys. 

Surprisingly, I'm not that annoyed by this event.  Normally, I'd be completely annoyed out of my mind, but today's a special day.  Today has been set aside to fight the forces of darkness, and a lost set of house keys will not deter me from today's purpose. 

So join me in praying for the Gongs.  Join me in praying against cancer.  Join me in praying against disease, injustice, and evil.  Join in me praying against sin.   

Thank You for hearing us. 

Joy

And I can't understand,
And I can't pretend,
that this will be alright in the end...

Joy - Page CXVII

Mercy, Lord Jesus. 

Come, Lord Jesus, come.

Please pray for the Gongs.

Toxic Country

This is what I deal with.

Don't ever take blue skies for granted.