The Triumphant Return!

About a month-and-a-half ago, my friend e-mailed me and told me that she missed reading my blog posts.  Apparently, my last post was over a year and a half ago... That's a long time - especially in a city like Shanghai.

In that time span, my sister got married, some of my best friends have left Shanghai, and I've come to learn a little bit more about myself and the God I serve.

But Christ in me, the hope of glory, remains. And I want to continue thanking Him each and every day for His new mercies, His providence, and His blessing.

So let me share a little story about God's providence.  At the expense of my beautiful sister on the night before her wedding day.

On the day of the wedding rehearsal (which was one day before the wedding day), my sister went with her bridal party to go get manicures.  For the manicure, she took her engagement ring off and tucked it into her jean pocket and promptly forgot about it.  As she was running late for the actual rehearsal - literally making the pastor and everyone else wait - she changed quickly in the empty parking lot of the nail salon and was driven to the church by her maid of honor Christine.

About three hours later, we were done with the rehearsal and were heading to Rudy's for dinner.  Christine walks up to me, pulls me away from my friend, and tells me: "Your sister can't find her ring.  We searched my car and it's not there.  She thinks it may have fallen out while she was changing in the parking lot."  Christine was surprisingly calm while she told me this - my sister, on the other hand, was actually a little pale.  Quite an accomplishment, really, because me and my sister are actually pretty tan (much to the chagrin of my Taiwanese mother). 

So my sister starts insisting on going with Christine and me to the nail salon to try and find the ring.  No dice.  She has to stay at the restaurant and host the rehearsal dinner with my brother-in-law.

Christine and I pile into her SUV, start driving to the nail salon... only to figure out 15 minutes later that we were going west on the highway when we should have been going east.  In the meantime, my sister keeps calling and asking us if we're there yet and continues to insist on taking her car to join us at the nail salon.  My job, during this entire time, is talk my sister into staying at the restaurant.  In my head, all I can think of is trying to picture what the ring looks like and where I can go buy a similar one at 10 pm on a Saturday night.  I quickly give up that thought and start praying.  Please Lord, let us find that ring!

30 minutes (but it really seemed more like an eternity) after we left the restaurant, Christine pulls into the parking lot, and as soon as her car's headlights hit the parking lot pavement, I see something shining.  I jump out of the car, grab the ring (not even checking whether it's Shan's or not) and we start driving back to the restaurant.

The entire time we're driving back to the restaurant, all I keep saying is: "Thank you Lord. Thank you, thank you, thank you."  It's just a rock, but He knew it was important to Shan and her family. 

The Journey

The journey continues. And while I'm here in Taiwan enjoying the Golden Week break, I am reminded of the way God led me, through so many amazing people, to where I am today.

And I believe. Thank You for them.

the dark side.

I understand, from a very personal level, how seductive anger can be. I remember when I had to spend 3 weeks doing due diligence in the middle of nowhere, reviewing documents in a language I wasn't entirely comfortable with... anger sustained me. Anger allowed me to focus on something other than the ridiculousness of the entire exercise. Anger kept me going.

"My Jay-Oh-Bee is just like a plantation." - Dead Prez

But ultimately anger is not sustainable. It shouldn't be. If it was, we would all be in so so much trouble...

one.

Sometimes I get the sneaking suspicion that God sent me to China to learn that I can't do life on my own.

cycles

My life progresses in cycles. With each cycle teaching me the same lesson over and over again. With each cycle bringing me ever closer to learning the same lesson. It's a simple lesson really... but like the pastor said... sometimes the longest journey for Christians is the 12 inches from the head to the heart.

Thank God for his infinite patience. Or is it patience if victory and triumph is assured? Either way... Hallelujah to the Lord of heaven and earth.

Nostalgia and Sentimentality

It's difficult living by yourself. It's worse when you decide to go down memory lane and be wistful, sentimental, nostalgic, etc...

I can still remember how things used to be. The images may not be vivid, but the feelings I felt back then come trickling back into my mind. I don't know why, but I've been watching a lot of Miyazaki stuff lately, and it really blows my mind how much I associate my childhood with certain of his movies. How my sister and I would fight over watching either Kiki's Delivery Service or Castle in the Sky.

I can't go back to then, but I thank God for those memories. And for the loved ones who make the memories that much more special. It's been forever since I've prayed for them... maybe that's why I've been feeling so off lately.

Time flies...

And the old lady in the subway station is once again selling those little fragrant white blossoms.

In 3 days I'll be 27. My father had my sister at 27 (ok, he was shy two months of his 27th birthday when he had her).

It's weird, but in my mind, my dad's always known the answer. If not the answer, he at least knew how to get to the answer. But if he was anything like me at 27... there was no way he was prepared to be a father. At 27, my father probably had little to no idea of how to be a father, he was only beginning to learn how to be a husband, and he probably just got his first small inkling of how to be a man. The thought would be somewhat comforting to me, if I could say the same about myself at 27 (I think most sons tend to measure themselves against their fathers).

I always tell people that I'm *insert whatever age* going on 17, and it's true. In my mind, I'm still 17 and it's still high school. I have no responsibilities and I really don't want any. If life is the journey that is supposed to grow boys into men, men into husbands and husbands into fathers, then I think (or rather, I'm sure) I'm still at the very early stages of that journey.

Maybe, one day in the distant future, I'll wake up and realize I'm a man, a husband, and/or a father but have no recollection of how I got to be those things. Or maybe I've already taken my first few steps away from boyhood, but I just haven't realized it yet (*highly unlikely IMHO*).

Or maybe I'm just thinking too much... or maybe not? But maybe... maybe I'll ask my dad. Then maybe I'll ask my Dad in heaven. And maybe I'll remember to thank him and Him for loving me.